The Melville Cat is a published columnist. Please read his column below.
I was invited to write an opinion piece for the Melville Residents Association newsletter. This comes as no surprise. I have resided in Melville for a decade and I am the most famous and well-respected feline in the suburb. I am also an experienced blogger.
I’ve lived in three Melville residences during my life. In 2011 I resided in two homes at once, unbeknownst to the humans involved. I convinced the humans of each home that I lived in their home only, thus procuring double the food (including chicken treats) and double the stroking of a normal cat. The humans eventually discovered my ruse but it was lovely while it lasted.
Since 2012 I have resided exclusively with a human called Heather (2Summers), and later with her human partner Ray. Life in the 2Summers household has been pleasant; I still receive a larger than average amount of stroking and chicken treats.
I experienced a hiccup in 2015 when the household moved from one side of Melville to the other, and the humans deceived me into coming along. I was displeased with the move at first, as this new Melville territory was unfamiliar to me.
I was so displeased, in fact, that I escaped the property to conduct some further explorations and became disoriented and lost. I wandered Melville alone for many days, singing the sad song of my people, and eventually found myself in a foreign territory called Westdene. It was dreadful.
A kind human named Danielle rescued me from the streets of Westdene and began to research my identity. She found my writings online; I’m surprised she wasn’t already familiar with them. Danielle is kind, but perhaps not very well read in the feline non-fiction genre.
Danielle contacted Heather, who came to Westdene and restored me to my rightful home in Melville. Since that experience I have come to appreciate the value of living in Melville, where I am well known and have access to a steady supply of chicken treats.
These days, I am careful to stay in my home territory and spend most of the time in my house and its immediate surrounds. I pay no mind to the other hysterical Melville felines who wander frequently into my territory, stealing bites of my food. Their behavior is beneath me.
I just remembered that this article was meant to be an opinion piece. Here is my opinion: Melville is a better place thanks to the Melville Cat.
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How have I never blogged about 44 Stanley Avenue, the coolest shopping and dining complex in Joburg, which is only five minutes from my house?
I guess it’s wrong to say I’ve never blogged about 44 Stanley; I’ve mentioned it countless times over the years (see here and here) when writing about specific restaurants or shops that are there. But I’ve never written a dedicated post about 44 Stanley as a destination and it’s about time I did – especially now, with the holidays upon us.
I’ve been dreadfully uninspired lately, struggling to think of anything I want to blog about despite having a long list of great ideas (many of which you, my readers, provided in September). I’m finding it hard to feel positive about life at the moment. But on Saturday Thorsten and I got the chance to visit Indwe Park, an indigenous garden and sculpture park in Braamfontein, and I knew I had my topic for today.
In 2020, I published a blog post with tips for Americans living in South Africa who wanted to vote in the U.S. presidential election. I thought about simply resharing that post this year. But then I realized: 1) I want to write a U.S. election post that will be fun and informative for everyone, not just other Americans; and 2) Believe it or not, the U.S. presidential election stakes are even higher in 2024 than they were in 2020. So I’m introducing you to some really cool Americans in Joburg – one who I’ve known forever and two who I just met – and tell you a bit about who they are, why they live here, and why they vote.
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It makes me smile, when I see it.